Gag Gift Boxes

Finger tip control...   9.25 by 2.5 by 1.5 inches    Some wear and warping to the box but does not affect its hilarity    Thank you for looking!

For the errant knight...   Made out of plastic   6.75 by 3.75  by 1.5 inches    Some wear, tear, and crushing to the box but does not affect its hilarity    Thank you for looking!

You light up my life...   Not a real light, just for jokes   6.75 by 3.75  by 1.5 inches    Some wear, tear, and crushing to the box but does not affect its hilarity    Thank you for looking!

Sounds like a naughty version on the Hokey Pokey...   Closed card 4 3/8 by 3.75 inches   Some wear and tear but does not affect its hilarity    Thank you for looking!

For the little guys littler guy...   Card is 5.5 by 4.5 inches   Some wear and staining but does not affect its hilarity    Thank you for looking!

Keep your head down!   Box 1 5/8 by 1 5/8 by 1 5/8 inches   Some wear and the spacing between boobs varies but does not affect its hilarity    Thank you for looking!

In the 90s, there was a legitimate need for protection...   Box 4 by 4  by 4 inches    Some wear to the box but does not affect its hilarity    Thank you for looking!

It really is possible!   6 by 3.5  by 1.5 inches    Some wear, tear, and crushing to the box but does not affect its hilarity    Thank you for looking!

That's one way to ruin a cake   3.5 by 2.5 by 1.5 inches    Some wear, stains, and scratches but does not affect its hilarity    Thank you for looking!

Another year older... another year shittier   Box 4.75 by 4.75 by 2.25 inches    Some wear and stains but does not affect the gifts hilarity   Thank you for looking!

You can make one at home! DIY!   Box 7.25 by 3 by 1.75 inches    Some minor wear does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

So that's the difference!   6 by 4 by 1.75 inches    Some minor wear but does not affect its hilarity    Thank you for looking!

The poor squirt never expected it!   7.75 by 3.5 by .75 inches    Some minor wear and tear but does not affect its hilarity    Thank you for looking!

For golf related emergencies   6.75 by 3.25 by 1 inches    Some minor wear but does not affect its hilarity    Thank you for looking!

And you thought you had some rough toilet paper   Does not actually do anything if plugged in   9.25 by 2.75 by 1.5 inches    Some wear to the box and corn cob but does not affect its hilarity    Thank you for looking!

Real fork, fake diet...   7.25 by 2.75 by .5 inches    Some wear to the box and tarnish on the fork but does not affect its hilarity    Thank you for looking!

I investigate the most private of matters...   6 by 3.5 by 1 inches    Some wear to the box but does not affect its hilarity    Thank you for looking!

The precursor to Spanx   3 5/8 by 2 5/8 by 7/8 inches    Some wear but does not affect its hilarity    Thank you for looking!

I guess this is the closest I'm ever getting to a fur coat...   3 5/8 by 2 5/8 by 7/8 inches    Some wear but does not affect its hilarity    Thank you for looking!

Wonder exactly what's he's thinking about...   Box 5 by 3.25 by 2.5 inches    Some wear to the box and cone but does not affect its hilarity. Cone does not stand on its own, it's a little top heavy.   Thank you for looking!

I'm going to need more pearls... and maybe some diamonds.   4.75 by 3.5 by 1 inches    Some wear to the box but does not affect its hilarity    Thank you for looking!

He's actually one of the better ones...   5.75 by 3.75 by .75 inches    Some wear to the box but does not affect its hilarity    Thank you for looking!

So that's why I've never won before   5.5 by 4.5 by 1 inches    Some wear to the box but does not affect its hilarity    Thank you for looking!

You can find other things in there too.   2.25 by 1.75 by .5 inches    Some minor wear but does not affect its hilarity    Thank you for looking!

For those hard to reach screws.   2.25 by 1.75 by .25 inches    Some minor wear but does not affect its hilarity    Thank you for looking!

Really get it stretched out...   2.25 by 1.75 by .25 inches    Some wear and imperfections but does not affect its hilarity    Thank you for looking!

I've been meaning to get my hands on this...   2.25 by 1.75 by .25 inches    Some minor wear but does not affect its hilarity    Thank you for looking!

A very specific kink.   2.25 by 1.75 by .25 inches    Some minor wear but does not affect its hilarity    Thank you for looking!

There's a reason it's the world's oldest profession.   2.25 by 1.75 by .25 inches    Some minor wear but does not affect its hilarity    Thank you for looking!

Never let your lighter run out of gas, eat beans!   7 by 4 by 1 inches    Some wear to the box but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

As you get older it becomes harder to do those everyday activities. Boom, this one problem solved!   Box 7.25 by 3.25 by 1.5 inches    Some wear to the box but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

Allergy season or cold season, sometimes you just need that extra hand, or finger.   Box 6 by 3 by 1.25 inches    Some wear and tear to the box but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

Not just for ladies but if you love a game of ring toss and penises, this is for you!   Box 5.75 by 5.75 by 1.75 inches    Some wear and tear to the box but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

Back when the boob tube was a portable device, the good old days.   Box is 3.5 by 3 by 1.75 inches    Some wear to the box but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

Is your nose always cold in the winter? If you live in a warm climate probably not so this isn't for you.   Card is 6.25 by 3.25 inches   Some minor wear but does not affect its hilarity    Thank you for looking!

Golf clubs are a metaphor for life and sex drive.   7 by 4.75 by 1 inches    Some minor wear but does not affect its hilarity    Thank you for looking!

Fuzzy balls are a favorite for everyone...who plays tennis that is.   Not an actual necklace, just a charm on a chain for jokes!   6 by 3 by 1.25 inches    Some wear and tear to the box but does not affect its hilarity   Thank...

Executives are just so busy! And if they wear these they are also probably sitting in their own shit.   Not actually wearable, just for jokes!   Box 8.25 by 6.25 by 1 inches   Some wear and tear to the box but does not affect its...

The best way to warm anyone's icy ass and maybe also their heart.   Does not actually do anything if plugged in, just for jokes!   Box 12.25 by 8.25 by 1.25 inches   Some wear and tear to the box but does not affect its...

This type of sock is a necessity for staying warm in the winter!   6.75 by 3.75 by 1.5 inches    Some wear to the box but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

If you smoke cigarettes, you are an asshole. This is just a fact.   6 by 3.5 by 1 inches    Some wear to the box but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

The best soap for getting all sides equally clean.   6.5 by 4.5 by 1.25 inches    Some wear to the box but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

An effective way for women to get all those nooks and crannies clean.   6.5 by 4.5 by 1.25 inches    Some wear to the box but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

For when you need to fit in tight spaces    5.5 by 4.5 by 1.25 inches    Some wear to the box but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

It's the little things that count!   4.25 by 3.5 by 1.25 inches    Some wear to the box but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

If it's your time of the month and you aren't feeling so hot, a fancy pad is sure to make you feel jazzier!    Box 11.75 by 5.75 by .75 inches    Some wear and tear to the box but does not affect its hilarity    Thank you...

As if normal length lingerie didn't provide enough access...   Box 8.25 by 6.75 by 1 inches    Some wear and tear to the box but does not affect its hilarity    Thank you for looking!

Good thing there are two there.   Box 4.5 by 4.5 by 2 inches    Some wear to the box but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

Leave nothing to the imagination   Box 7.5 by 4.5 by 1 inches    Some wear to the box but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

The only way to ensure you never lose.   3 by 2 by 1 inches    Some minor wear but does not affect its hilarity    Thank you for looking!

Facts, if you can't get any food in your mouth, you will lose weight.   Box 6.25 by 5 by 1 inches    Some wear and writing on the box and some old stickers on the back but does not affect its hilarity    Thank you for looking!

Even bald heads need self care.   Box 7.75 by 2.5 by .75 inches    Some wear to the box but does not affect its hilarity    Thank you for looking!

Do not share with others, it's unhygienic.   Box 14.25 by 2.5 by 1.25 inches    Some wear to the box but otherwise great vintage condition    Thank you for looking!

Keep it warm and supported.   5.25 by 4 by 1.25 inches    Some wear to the box but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

I hate it when my rod gets cold.   6.75 by 3.75 by 1.5 inches    Some wear to the box but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

Forgotten beauty tips from the past.   7.75 by 3.75 by .75 inches   Some wear to the box and her butt has become concave but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

Now you can keep your nipples warm!   10 by 4 by 1.25 inches    Some wear to the box but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

100% guaranteed to prevent pregnancies. As a bonus, it also prevents cheating.   6.75 by 3.75 by 1.75 inches    Some wear, tear, and tape reminders on the box but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

When you have trouble getting it in...   5.5 by 4.5 by 1.25 inches    Some wear to the box but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

The only fool proof way! Actually this method depends on them being a fool.   6 by 3 by 1.25 inches    Some wear, tear, and crushing to the box but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

Warms all kinds of hot dog shaped things.   6 by 3.5 by 1 inches    Some wear to the box but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

I bet you thought it was going to be something else...   Box 6 by 3 by 1.35 inches    Some minor wear to the box but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

Seniors are looking really sexy...   Box is 5 by 4 by 1 inches    Some wear to the box but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

If you really need to practice...   Box 6.5 by 3 by 2 inches   Some wear to the box but still an awesome unique piece   Thank you for looking!

Well when it's that size...   Box 6.5 by 3 by 2 inches   Some wear to the box but still an awesome unique piece   Thank you for looking!

Get really good at it...   Box 6.5 by 3 by 2 inches   Some wear to the box but still an awesome unique piece   Thank you for looking!

For those who enjoy the very best...   Most likely real fur.   Box 7 by 7 by 3 inches   Some wear and tear to the box but otherwise great vintage condition   Thank you for looking!

For fancy butts only.   Box 3.75 by 3.75 by 1.75 inches   Some minor wear but otherwise great vintage condition   Thank you for looking!

The number one recommended gum massager...   Does not actually do anything if plugged in.   5 by 4 by 1.25 inches    Some wear to the box but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

A glove like that is sure to be very handy...   6 by 4 by 1 inches    Some wear to the box but does not affect it's hilarity   Thank you for looking!

You need all three to fully optimize your fun.   3 by 2 by 1 inches    Some minor wear but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

You'll always have that, until it stops working...   3 by 2 by 1 inches    Some minor wear but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

For when you're feeling fancy and don't want to have kids...   3 by 2 by 1 inches    Some minor wear but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

You should probably get that appraised.   Box 3.5 by 3.25 by 1.75 inches    Some minor wear but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

It's like a genie lamp except you don't get any wishes.   6 by 3.5 by 1 inches   Some wear to the box but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

All maidens would be delighted to have one.   6 by 3 by 1.5 inches    Some wear to the box but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

I don't see a problem here...   3 by 2 by 1 inches    Some minor wear but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

Fruit salad is very healthy, especially when the fruit looks like that.   7.25 by 4.25 by 1.75 inches    Some wear and stains but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

Believe it or not, this is actually too small for Superman.   10 by 4 by 1.25 inches    Some wear to the box but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

The bigger the better...   Box 8 by 3.75 by .75 inches    Some wear to the box but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

When you go even further in the future, bathing suits cease to exist.   6.5 by 3.5 by 1 inches    Some minor wear but otherwise great vintage condition   Thank you for looking!

Suck on that...   Box 6 by 5.25 by 2 inches  Pacifier 3 inch diameter    One of the boobs is worn down but still a hilarious gift   Thank you for looking!

I don't actually get the joke here so if you do, you're definitely a genius.    3 by 2 by 1 inches    Some minor wear but does not affect its hilarity    Thank you for looking!

I wasn't expecting that one...   3 by 2 by 1 inches    Some minor wear but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

My heart throbs for you...   6 by 3.5 by 1 inches    Some wear to the box but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

Hope you pass the test...   6 by 3 by 1.25 inches    Some wear to the box but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

Keep all your sensitive parts warm in the winter.   Box 5 by 4 by .75 inches    Some wear to the box but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

Lock it up and throw away the key.   7.5 by 5 by .75 inches    Some wear to the box but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

Doctor recommended for good oral hygiene...   Box 7.5 by 4 by 1 inches    Great vintage condition   Thank you for looking!

Designed with you in mind...   7 by 3.25 by 1 inches    Some wear to the box but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

At least he's still trying...   8.25 by 4.25 by 1 inches    Some wear to the box but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

Never worry about a limp part ever again...   8.25 by 3.25 by 1 inches    Some wear to the box but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

The only way to get some people to brush their teeth.   7.5 by 1 by .75 inches    Some wear to the box but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

And it usually won't stay up for too long.   Box 4.75 by 3.5 by 1.25 inches   Some wear to the box but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

A snack that you'd want for all meals...   Box is 4.75 by 5.25 by 2.75 inches    Some wear to the box but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

Glad it's not fattening...   Box is 3.75 by 2.75 by 1 inches    Some wear to the box but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

No need to wrap it, I'll use it now.   Box 3.75 by 3.25 by 1.75 inches    Some minor wear to the box but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

And they are the only way into a woman's...heart.   3 by 2 by 1 inches    Some minor wear but does not affect its hilarity    Thank you for looking!

It's more fun to destroy.   3 by 2 by 1 inches    Some minor wear but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!

A girl just can't resist beautiful flowers.   Box 7.25 by 3.25 by 2.25 inches    Some minor wear but does not affect its hilarity   Thank you for looking!